Find out what being bi means to these bisexual people

Tomorrow (23 Sept) marks Bisexuality Day.

It’s seen as a day of both celebration and visibility.

We asked a variety of bisexual people what being bi means to them.

The answers show you just how varied the experience of bisexuality can be.

Regardless of experience though, biphobia and bi erasure are always prevalent issues.

Paige, 21, Australia

‘There was never a moment where I realized “oh I might like girls too.” I was always bisexual I just didn’t know the technical word for it until later on in life. It wasn’t like an epiphany, it was just like “oh it has a label.”

‘For me being bi just feels like a natural thing. I never understood why who you can love is chosen for you. It’s not about being greedy or selfish, it’s about liking both the river and the sea. Girls are pretty and boys are pretty too. I am attracted to both men and women, and it doesn’t matter who I choose to spend my life with. It’s about love, not gender.’

Elena, 22, USA

‘It means that I’m attracted to more than one gender, but I look for different things in the partners of each gender I date. That’s where my distinction between that and pansexual who love people regardless of gender is.’

Bee, 23, UK

‘Bisexuality means queerness. I tend to use queer and bisexual interchangeably. Partly because I can’t let go of the term ‘bi’ which I originally found and identified with. But also because I subscribe to the definition of bisexuality is an attraction to my gender and other genders. I can and want to have romantic, sexual, and other types of relationships with anyone. And also it’s a bit of a fuck you to the convention, to stereotypes, to rules and definitions.

‘Sadly, bisexuality has also meant stigma. It often means biphobia. It means not feeling “gay enough” for some of my queer friends, but not straight enough to be accepted by the mainstream. It has meant being sexualized and demonized in the same sentence. It has meant difficult conversations, where I am repeatedly coming out and explaining myself. It means I have not been allowed to be myself because others do not ‘agree’ or accept it. It has at times meant I felt excluded, isolated, and confused.

‘Ultimately, bisexuality means love. It determines who and how I love. I am currently in a monogamous relationship with a cis bisexual man. People look at us and assume we are a straight couple, but we are queer as hell and our love is as real as anyone else’s. I am so full of love, of so many kinds. I love my queer friends, they are my chosen family, and I have a special bond with my fellow bi pals. And, to be honest, I love myself. I love being bi and wouldn’t ever want to change who I am.’

Bisexuals at Pride in London.Bis of Colour

Bisexuals at Pride in London.

Alexis, 21, USA

‘Being bisexual to me means that I can be myself. Live the life I want to, love who I love, and do what I want to do. Being bisexual, doesn’t mean significant anything really, it’s just a part of what makes me, me.’

Ary, 40, UK

‘To be honest, I feel…

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