How much anal sex are gay men really having (and in what position)?

There’s a belief out there that gay men are having anal sex every single day.

It turns out that isn’t the case whatsoever.

New research by Bespoke Surgical interviewed 300 gay men of different ages about their sex lives.

It found:

  • 13% have anal sex daily
  • 39% of gay men have it a couple times a week
  • 24% of gay men have it a couple times a month
  • 5 in 6 gay men have it at least a few times a year
  • One in six has it less than once a year

This means around 16% likely never have

Read anal sex, preferring mutual masturbation, blowjobs etc.

Anal sex: Gay men are more likely to be tops

Gay men prefer to be a top (39%), vers (33%) and bottom (29%).

Bespoke Surgical also found preparation impacts many people.

They found:

  • 42% of gay men always or frequently use an anal cleanser
  • 38% rarely or never do
  • 21% sometimes use an anal cleanser
  • Gay men who have anal sex daily are 2.1 times more likely to always use an anal cleansing product
  • Generally speaking, the less frequently someone has anal sex, the more likely they are to never use an anal cleansing product

But in terms of what they actually use, the ones that bottom say:

  • 25% use a water-based enema
  • 20% use a saline enema
  • 18% use a shower adapter

On hygiene, safe sex and sex toys

Sex prep can be more about feeling personally clean rather than for health practices:

  • 78% of gay men think about hygiene always or most of the time during anal sex
  • 9% never do
  • 61% feel more comfortable or ‘cleaner’ if they used an anal cleanser post-sex.

On safe sex:

  • 37% always use a condom while having sex
  • 21% occasionally do
  • 16% never do
  • 41% of gay men have experienced tearing or other damage from anal sex

On sex toys:

  • 55% use one for pleasure, to prepare, or both
  • 41% use one at least to prepare
  • 45% don’t use a sex toy for anal sex at all

Are gay men having more anal sex than straight women?

The researchers also asked an equal number of straight women about their relationship with anal sex.

To compare, 56% of straight women report having anal sex less than once per year.

But saying that, one in four straight women said they did so at least a couple times a month.

A spokesperson said: ‘In this survey, we sought to learn more about the sex preparation practices of gay men and straight women, and we now have a broad understanding of how each group compares.

‘With analyses like this one, our goal is to establish ourselves as an authority on proper sexual health practices and representation of LGBTQ+ voices.

‘We hope that by shedding light on these topics, we can improve the position of those who are impacted by them.’

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